low self-esteem: overview - Northlight Counseling

Low Self Esteem

Self-Esteem can be described as the way we view ourselves. It is important to have high self-esteem so that we can take new risks and feel confident and happy about our lives. If we have low self-esteem, we can work at building it higher, with some counseling for improving our self-talk.

Here is a small test you can take, to determine if you have low self-esteem:

  • Do you think more positive thoughts about yourself than negative thoughts throughout the day?
  • When you look back on your life, do you feel proud of at least some of your accomplishments?
  • Do you feel that you measure up?
  • Are you confident when speaking to others?
  • When doing an activity, do you think to yourself that you can accomplish it?
  • When you think about what others think of you, do you think positive thoughts?
  • Do you like yourself?
  • Are you typically good to yourself?
  • Do you describe yourself to others in positive ways?
  • Do you take new risks occasionally?

If you answered “No” to 5 or more of the questions in this quiz, you may have low self-esteem. Raising your self-esteem may require some help. Let’s face it; If you know how to build your own self-esteem, you probably would have done it by now. I would like to help you improve your self-esteem and begin living your life with a realistic measure of self confidence so you can become the person you were designed to be.

Low Self Esteem in Children

If your child or teen has low self-esteem, I can help him or her too! Did you know that the more positive the parents’ self-esteem, the more positive the child’s will be? You can build your child’s self esteem by:

  • Appreciating your child
  • Telling your child that you love them
  • Spending time with your child
  • Encouraging your child to make choices
  • Fostering independence in your children
  • Giving genuine importance to your child’s opinion and listening
  • Taking the time to explain reasons
  • Feeding your child with positive encouragement
  • Encouraging your child to try new and challenging activities

Symptoms of Low Self Esteem

Here are some lies that people with low self-esteem believe:

  • “I must meet certain standards to feel good about myself. If I fail to meet these standards, I cannot really feel good about myself.”
  • “My approval by certain people determines my self-worth.”
  • “I am what I am. I cannot change. I am hopeless.”
  • “Those who fail are unworthy of love and deserve to be blamed and condemned.”

Believing the lies that entrap us can keep us from experiencing all that life has to offer. If you believe others’ opinions of you or your performance determines your self-worth, you’ve got a lot to learn. The truth is that there is a lot of hope for change, if you are willing to do some work.

Treatment of Low Self Esteem

Treatment for low self-esteem typically involves changing your perspective and changing your thinking. Though friends and family may try to help, they may not have the skills necessary to get to the root of your problem. A professional skilled in cognitive-behavioral therapy will guide you step-by-step in the process of challenging your false thinking. Learning how to have confidence and higher self-esteem takes practice, and it might take some guidance by a professional. Contact me for an appointment.

self esteem resources

helpful websites